Sadie Cohen: Bounty Hunter

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Sadie Cohen: Bounty Hunter

Part One: Tex Deadly Rides at Moonrise

Glory Fink

Jul 18, 2025

Transcript

Sadie Cohen: Bounty Hunter

Part One: Tex Deadly Rides at Moonrise

Content Advisory: Language, gun violence, grief, frontier justice, and wry humor.

Broke, hungry, and slightly annoyed, Sadie Cohen sets out to catch a drunk horse thief. Turns out, Clem’s hiding more than just stolen livestock.

Meet Sadie Cohen—bounty hunter, occasional charmer, and full-time chaos in a wide-brimmed hat. Folks around these parts know her as Tex Deadly, a name with just enough bite to make people mind their manners. She’s not in the business of high-stakes takedowns—she prefers her fugitives soft, sloppy, and already half-asleep.

This is where our story starts. There’s a wanted poster, a lakeside shack, and a man who sings badly when drunk. Sadie’s hungry, needs a bath, and has exactly one plan: cash in a bounty without firing a single bullet.

Tex Deadly Rides at Moonrise

By Glory Fink

Fuck, I need money!

Lucky for me I'm a bounty hunter and this world is filled to the brim with bandits, crooks and horse thieves. I don't go in for the high dollar bounties. Those guys are wily, resourceful and often either intelligent or crazy violent. Low dollar bounties, on the other hand, are often slow-witted, lazy and relatively easy going once caught.

My name's Sadie Cohen but around here I go by Tex Deadly because people believe the advertising. I dress like a man who rides a horse all day because that's exactly what I do and because it fools some people into assuming I'm a young man and frankly, I like wearing the clothes I wear. I wear a large leather vest which obscures my hips and breasts and I keep my hair short so hardly anyone ever gives me a second glance. Of course, I kept my hair when I chopped it off. I keep it sewn up into a bun hair piece for when I want to dress up pretty and go dancing. Then I’m sweet Miss Sadie again… for the evening.

WANTED: Clem Johnson for Horse Thievery
Reward: $50 — Return to Wilson Stables, Theodore Junction

Now I know Clem and he is most definitely a horse thief.

He's also a bit of a drunk… your standard issue rake. Easy on the eyes and he knows it so he tries to use his good looks and sweet words to get away with all manner of thefts. Knowing Clem, he's most likely gone to hideout in his secret shack near Crystal Lake waiting for the heat to die down back in town. But Clem didn't count on Tex Deadly needing some cash for a hot meal, a hotter bath and a warm bed.

By the time I found Clem's shack it was nightfall. Now it was just a matter of waiting for Clem to get sloppy drunk and then it would be easy to bring him in especially as I just spied a wagon nearby and 2 horses grazing, probably from Wilson Stables. That would be an extra $125 to bring them in. Things were looking up for ol' Tex.

By moonrise Clem was inebriated enough he was singing sad songs to himself. Loudly. He seemed lonely. It seemed like such a lonely way to spend an evening. Did he not know how to read? Maybe he doesn't know there are some really great magazines filled with adventure stories.

Once Clem was snoring, I hooked up the horses and wagon, then I quietly entered the shack. It looked cozy, like a tiny version of a homestead.

I roused Clem, "Here let's get you to bed Clem."

Grabbed his blanket and gently but firmly steered his shoulders out into the waiting wagon. Got him laid out in the wagon then stroked his hair and sang lullabies to him 'til he started snoring, again. Then it was just a matter of tying his wrists and ankles each to a bar so he couldn't untie himself, killing the stove's fire, the kerosene lamp and locking the shack up. I picked up my horse, Buckaroo, on the way and we made our slow journey back to town by moonlight with Clem's soft snoring to serenade the crickets.

Why did I grab Clem's blanket, you may ask?

I'm here to tell you, the territories contain relatively few people. Small time criminals don't spend long in jail so it pays to be recognized as a considerate bounty hunter. Jails don't often have blankets and my bounties appreciate when I see them on the street later that I'm thinking about their comfort and welfare.

When Clem woke up around dawn he cursed and yelled for a bit. I'd be surprised if he didn't but we were nearly to Theodore Junction.

When he calmed down he said, "Obviously, you know I'm Clem. What's your name, sir?"

"It's Tex, Clem. I brought you a blanket and locked up your shack before heading out." I answered.

"Well then please accept my apologies for my language and my thanks for securing my home. I've heard good things about you, young bounty hunter." Clem said.

Gossip is the fuel of a bounty hunter's trade. Trading in gossip is how one hears about wanted men's secret hideouts and which saloon girls they're sweet on.

"Seems like a good bounty hunter wouldn't have much good said about him... if he's doing his job, I reckon." I countered. I was curious to see if I could get Clem to share some gossip despite his prone predicament.

"Well," he drawled out, "I heard you're a dead shot but you prefer to shoot cans instead of men."

I grunted. It's true, to injure or kill a man is something I'll do if it's him or me, but otherwise I'd just as soon tie up a man to bring him in.

Clem continued, "I heard if your capture doesn't give you much trouble you're respectful of their possessions and usually grab their blanket so they don't freeze at night in jail. And now I can confirm that appears to be true."

"You make me sound soft. I'm going to get a bad reputation if this keeps up. Sooner or later some idiot's going to think I'm a gentleman and then I'm going to have to shoot just to put the fear of me into him," I grimaced.

"Reputations are as much grown as they are earned. Why for a whiskey, I'd be willing to swear Tex Deadly is the most cold blooded bounty hunter I've ever had the misfortune to cross paths with."

He paused like he was thinking. We were reaching the outskirts of Theodore Junction. I figured he was considering how he was going to deal with Wilson Stables and the deputies.

But he surprised me when he said all low and husky like, "And for a hot bath, I'd give Miss Sadie a night worth remembering…."

I froze in my seat not sure how to respond.

Slowly, I turned back to look at Clem.

He just smiled at me like an innocent babe.

"I'll mention that to Miss Sadie the next time I meet her." I said while trying steady my voice.

Was I scared? Nope. Honestly, I was thrilled. Clem's good looking and bounty hunting is lonely work.

Next Time on Sadie Cohen: Bounty Hunter...

Clem's out of jail, freshly bathed, and sitting across the table from Tex Deadly… shirtless, charming, and entirely unaware that he's about to lose at strip pinochle. Sadie’s determined to let her long johns hit the floor after Clem drops his guard… but will he catch on before whiskey turns him into a tragic tale of missed opportunity?

Cards, stew, and one very awkward revelation await.
Let’s just say… Derring-Do Magazine isn’t the only thing getting fondled tonight.